Tuesday, March 30, 2010

 

i’m so in love with my new header picture!!!!!

♥

 

daddy inspired me to re-edit this picture till its at its top-top perfect condition.

The last few Pictures we managed to take before daddy left us for the 1st and final time.

Going thru these pictures, there’s no way i could hold back those tears,

i’m not sure whether they are tears of joy (as he is no longer suffering) or whether are they tears of sadness ( i miss daddy a lot).

Recently, they are so many things happening in this family,yes it might seem a little complex to us but i know if daddy was around things will be so much easier.

Daddy might not seem what bothered to what we are doing, but i can tell that deep in his heart,

he loves us and he’s super concerned about our daily lives.

Simply because he doesn’t want us to be on the wrong path of life.

I believe every parents love their kids as much as they love themselves, or even they love their kids more then themselves, that they’re willing to go thru every single piece of shit to provide their kids a comfortable life. Isn’t that so ?

Anyways, daddy…… he’s one of the greatest example!! I think the only thing that was holding him back all these years, was us. Yes, his children. I’m 22 this year, and yanqi is only 15. I’m so sure he wants, to see each of us growing up healthily, finding the right partner and of course getting to see his 4 lovely daughters walking down the aisle with her bridegroom and giving birth to his grandchildren.

But, i’m sorry dad, life is not what you’ve expected. Life is just unfair. why of all so many people, it must be you, my dad?!

i hate it! i hate evil things separating me from my love ones. Especially my family. I hate it, if anyone walks into the family, breaking this family up intentionally! And if that person someday exist, I will never forgive that person.

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Mummy’s last picture with daddy.

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can you see that lovely smile on his face? (:

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IMG_1809 THE 6 RINGS, IS ACTUALLY SIZED TO DADDY’S THUMB. Today, the 5 rings are all hanging on our necks,

and daddy’s? He’s ring is left in his little urn

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On a lighter side of life……

 

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thanks to Doreen for everything. From rushing down from home to MEH just to get the rings for us.

Being with guan yi thru out the whole thing, it wasn’t easy for her too,

coming down to the wake almost everyday, helping out with my family and of course brought alot of laughter to our home too! (: thanks.

Thanks for being guan yi’s friend ever since her 1st day of primary school, till today!! (:

Sunday, March 28, 2010

Its all confused.. all words.. all letters.. but there’s no feelings behind it.

i hate to admit, but i realised that my emotions are constantly revolving around you.I hate to feel this way, but i just cant help it. Its time for me to get back to where i came from! Trust. Trust is the word that i’m still searching for in you, till today. Soul searching doesn’t tell me all, as I've found out that from the start, that there’s nothing in me. Soul-less is still the word. Perhaps, you’ve got all it takes to take control of how i feel, but i’m not gonna let you have it your way. Cos its my life.

♥

 

 

Saturday, March 27, 2010

Earth Hour.

Where were you and how did you spend this special one hour?

 

For me, i spent my earth hour with my mum and sis at the basement washing the cars. haha! Eventful huh?

Anyways, it was spent wisely, though! Family will be my top priority from now on. It will take me nothing to go all the way out just for my family, cos at the end of the day, its family who stands beside you no matter what.

I hope you guys had a wonderful Earth Hour! (:

Sunday, March 21, 2010

Daddy’s passing on.

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Now that he’s gone, the only way to flip thru his journey of life with us, is thru our hearts.

daddy has peacefully passed on, on the 13.03.2010,

at MEH, the place where memories haunts me, till today.

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the last family picture at MEH (mount Elizabeth Hospital).

 

i’ve been dreading to blog about this incident, that I've got to flip back all the days we had with him, from his last night to today.

its not easy to blog about it, as the wounds in me are still as fresh as yesterday. Losing your loved ones forever is not an easy truth to learn, let alone be accepting.

But, come to think of it, we cannot be selfish, leaving him by our side will not do good to both the family and himself, daddy has been struggling for the past 2 and the half years, just for the family.

We all know that he wants to get well, go back to work and let us lead a luxurious life, like we had for the past few years, but daddy, its time to take a break. Its time to sit back and relax, let us handle this ourselves, you have given us much more then we have asked for, from nothing, you have given us a condo to live in, a Mercedes to drive in when i had my license, another car for mummy, cos we didn't had “enough” car to use. We were able to go on vacations just like going over to Sentosa. I think its time for us to take over this time and rest peacefully.

No more sufferings, no more pain, no more painkillers, no more needles, no more chemotherapy,no more getting warded, no more sleepless nights, ANYMORE. ITs the End.

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lastly, i want to thank God for providing us with this lovely daddy, without him, there will not be happiness in this family.

i also wish to thank daddy for everything he has given us. the laughter, joy, tears, confidence, and countless support to this family. He may be strict, but he also has the lovely side which we never got to discover only till the end.

i sincerely thank him, for all the motivation, and the unconditional love that he has showered upon me for the past 21 years of life.

thanks daddy!

may you rest in peace,

and we love you.

 

to me, daddy has been the greatest leader, the strongest hero, the best teacher, and the most beautiful dad on earth.